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The heaviness of life will sometimes push you into a place of hopelessness. It will have you loose faith in all things that you know to be true. It will have you in a place where you don’t trust anyone or anything. Life is meant to test you but not meant to put you in a place of isolation or despair. It is meant to grow you, to test your faith, to build you up in areas you are weak in. It is meant to keep you moving because if you stop, you may get stuck and if you get stuck that may bring on another set of problems. Living life is the only way to get through life and the tests to come. A couple of ways that I have learned to get through the heaviness of life are…
- Prayer…Prayer…Prayer… I cannot stress this enough. Prayer is now my first choice in any type of test, trial and tribulation even when I am just happy I pray. I pray long and often. I pray to the point where sometimes I say “God I’m back again.” I take this prayer thing serious. No games played when it comes to me praying and I pray about EVERYTHING!!!
- Scripture…I write scripture. Whatever I am feeling at the moment I search it in my Bible app and I read and write the scriptures that are given and that I relate to. This has had an amazing affect on changing my mood and helping me get through. Reading is great but writing them down reinforces them for me. One of my favorite scriptures is Proverbs 3:5-6 – “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”
- I reach out to those that will encourage me. They will let me vent and allow me to be human and then speak life into me. Words of encouragement reminders of where I have been and grown to where I am not. Keep positive people around you.
- Walk and Exercise… The goal that I set for myself at the beginning of the year to lose 60 pounds has been a life saver. Walking has provided time for me to get out and free and clear my mind. I usually listen to music while walking but being able to just get out in the fresh air and just be by myself brings me to a peaceful place and tunes me back up.
- I remember my “WHY”… My why for life, why am I here, why do I have this purpose and “WHY” brings me back to hope, to faith, to love, and to positivity.
Don’t lose faith in life. Don’t let the trials and tribulations bring you down. Life is going to happen that is one thing that you can count on but it is how you move through that counts. I haven’t been proud of all of my move through moments but I am glad that I kept moving.
Keep moving your story doesn’t end here.
I am not a fan of being scared but I have been scared of everything it seems like for the better part of my life and that fear has had me stuck. I used to always refer to myself as a scary person and I really meant it. I realize that I have missed out on so much in life because I was scared to make the moves that I needed to make. You know the saying “No risk No reward”, I wasn’t risking anything and I definitely wasn’t getting rewarded. Moving to Atlanta was the first major risk that I took in my life but I got here and froze. I got in a place of complacency and got off track from doing what I planned to do when I moved here. I often had thoughts of just moving back to South Carolina but what would I say if I moved back … “It got too hard”, “”Atlanta just wasn’t for me”, “I really belong in the country anyway,” “I want to be near my family,” and so many other excuses. Truth is my pride has kept me in Atlanta and my pride has kept me complacent. Sucks right…
I am a super prideful person and I don’t ever want to fail at anything so I don’t start a lot of things for fear of failing or not finishing it. Pride has kept me in a box for most of my adult life. It wasn’t until 2010 when I took a chance and went skydiving with a friend and I realized that there is so much that I need to be doing and should be doing. Although I remained stuck for a little while longer…
Change doesn’t happen over night you know… (rolls eyes at myself lol)
But if I can jump out of a plane at 14,000 ft up then I probably shouldn’t be scared to do anything else? Well ok…
Fast forward to now and I am still fearful of things, of making the moves that I need and want to make but I know that if I don’t make them that I will be once again stuck in wishing, hoping and wanting it to happen without me taking the steps that I need to.
Some of my biggest fears have been…
-Fear of Success…I always think of the line “Mo Money Mo Problems” and who really wants more problems. I just want to make my family proud and with that comes expectations. I’ve never wanted to be famous but I do want to leave a legacy and be legendary in my own right. I want to leave my mark on this beautiful world and if I let fear and pride keep me from it that will suck. Starting this business has been the biggest risk that I have taken in awhile and I want so badly for it to grow and flourish and become a major force in the life coaching world. I am working harder than I ever have on anything to make Simply My Purpose amazing and a success.
-Fear of Failure…The opposite of success, I know. But i don’t want to lose anymore than I want to succeed. Everything that I have dreamed of, envisioned, been purposed in me I am scared that I won’t get to it all. I almost feel like I want too much out of life and I am scared that it will never be enough for me.
-Fear of Marriage…Marriages these days are nothing like my grandparents. Everyone is so quick to give up and no one wants to put in the work to make it work. We don’t have that stick and stay mentality. I want the long lasting love and commitment that they had (both sets). I just want to know that if I’m going hard for you and our relationship that my partner is doing the same. I’m not a hopeless romantic but I am a lover of love and I completely believe in it. It scares me but I desire to be married but I am in NO hurry to get married any time soon.
There is a scripture that I am holding onto these days very tight and it is …
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love and self-discipline.
2 Timothy 1:7
When ever I am ready to give up and stop myself from moving I reflect on this verse and just keep moving. We aren’t suppose to be scared of making moves, creating moments, and enjoying life. So don’t let fear catch you up and keep you stuck in a place that you ultimately don’t want to be. Go Big or Go Home and going home isn’t an option for me.
So I challenge you all to not be scared of anything and to stop letting fear hold you back from living the BOLD life that you were created to live. I would love to hear from you, comment and let me know what is holding you back from moving forward with your dreams. I am here to encourage you and help you get out of that box.
Hope to talk to you soon.
One thing that we can definitely count on in life is CHANGE.
If you are a betting person you can bet your last dollar on the fact that change is going to come at some point in your life more than once, twice, three times. It is always around the corner. The worst thing that I think you can do is resist it because it only makes things harder for you because it’s going to happen whether your on board or not. Change means growth in some part of your life. You can’t be stuck in the same spot all of the time and in my opinion that would get a little boring.
Some ways that I handle change are listed below.
Talking to God keeps me grounded during times of change. I always pray for guidance and vision … “God help me to see what you are doing in my life right now, give me understanding”. Its a simple prayer but powerful because He always shows me and I may not like what I see but its happening and I just need to go with it. In the end it is always for my good.
You don’t have to jump all the way into the change when it starts but you should be taking baby steps to get to the place you are being pushed to. Don’t resist it!!!
I have written in a journal since I was in elementary school. I never knew how therapeutic it would be until I got older and realized that God was leading me here. If you are writing while going through, you are getting your feelings out and if you go back and read some older entries in your journal you will see that you were being led to this point anyway. There is always a prep we just ignore it sometimes.
I hate to admit it but I have been terrible at this. I don’t like reaching out to people when I am going through things. I always have this battle within myself going on when it comes to me calling someone and talking to them about the change I am going through. I have recently started doing it more but it literally takes me days to actually act on calling who I have been led to call. If I hear it on Monday I am going to be like God I need another sign by Wednesday and I will do it. It then becomes this anxiety in me that is definitely unnecessary. However, no man is an island and you need support to help you through because change isn’t easy. You aren’t meant to go through things alone.
Change is happening all around you and unless you live under a rock (even then the soil changes around you) you will be phased by it. I haven’t always embraced it but I have settled on the fact that whether I like it or not it is coming. If there is no change there is no growth and who doesn’t want to continue to grow.
Get excited about the growth that is taking place in your life. I guarantee you will like where you end up.
Leave me a note letting me know how you handle change.
Talk to you again soon,
I am who I Am
So much of our time, energy and attention is wasted trying
to convince other people how wrong they are about us. We
want them to know we are not ignorant, lazy heathens. We want
them to retract the untruth that has been told. We try to
convince them that we have a valid history, a rich culture
and that our ancestors have valuable contributions to the
development of the world. We spend so much time trying to
show them who we are not, we lose sight of who we really are.
It is not our responsibility to prove to people who we are.
Our job and responsibility is to “be.” What you do is proof
of who you are; manifestation is realization. People have a
right to think whatever they choose to think. Just because
they think it does not make it right.
You must live within your sacred truth
So I am not sure who the author of the above write up is but I really like it. How many times have you caught yourself trying to please others only to realize that they will never truly be satisfied with what you are doing or have done? Yeah, I’ve been in that spot and I have been the person that seemed to never be satisfied as well. But when I realized that I cannot make others happy and I can’t expect everyone to make me happy without first making myself happy it was a really freeing experience. Don’t get me wrong I love the feeling of pleasing others or serving others but it cannot consume you. You can never live your life for others. Well I won’t say never you can do it, you just won’t be completely happy. How do you feel when you accomplish something that you truly wanted to do verses something that someone thought that you should accomplish? Do your goals and dreams represent your core and passion or what someone else thinks it should be? The first step in making yourself happy is spending time with yourself and finding out who you are. Keep in mind that this will definitely change as you go through your life. No one should ever stay the same… Your life should always reflect growth. When you stop growing you should be dead (blunt but truth). I believe in order to convince others of who you are is not by speaking it but just living your life according to you and the purpose and passion that God has placed in you. Actions tell more of a story than words do when living your life according to your dreams, goals and purpose. At the end of your life do you want to look back and say I was a great imitation of what they wanted me to be or I was the greatest ME that I could give the world and that is enough for me? Things to think about … Leaving a legacy is something I value in living my life but I don’t want it to be a legacy of imitation and convincing others of what they think I should be. Spend time with yourself developing you and living your life according to your path. Don’t waste time on convincing others of who you are, if they are truly interested they will take the time to watch and get to know you. Live your truth and it will definitely shine. Keep shining people!!!!
Thanks for reading my thoughts.
Previously written on my blog SimplyMyLifeZ on 5/19/14
Taking a step back… I know that I introduced myself in the About Me page and gave you a little snippet in my first blog post “My New Thing” but I thought let me give the people a little more. So I did this little exercise awhile back but I have since updated it. So here are 20 quick facts about me in no particular order.
- My dreams scare me to the point that sometimes I want to stay complacent where I am.
- I love fresh flowers.
- I love that I grew up with brothers. I don’t ever remember wishing for sisters but I am grateful for the ladies in my life that I can call sisters.
- I don’t want to be famous but I want to work with famous people.
- I want a huge successful business that empowers people daily.
- I want to be a strong role model for my nieces and nephews.
- I feel like I’m a good friend however I’m still growing in areas.
- I love attention but I only want it from certain people.
- I loved to be spoiled and I am quite spoiled. Thanks Mom!!!!
- I want to be the greatest at everything that I put my hands on.
- I want a huge house on a hill away from the rest of the world.
- I would rather be home with a good book and my journal than to be out and about in the world.
- I love to eat candy, cupcakes, and cookies. Sweets …
- I want to do a really sexy maybe semi nude or nude photo shoot one day.
- I want to learn how to play an instrument.
- I want to take cooking classes.
- I am super mushy and soft but I put a very huge tough front.
- I really want my family to be like the Brady Bunch and be super close.
- I honestly don’t need a lot to be happy but I want to be happy.
- By any means necessary I want my life to reflect hard work, dedication, love, peace, balance, success and all things positive especially God.
I hope this gives you a little peak into who I am and I will do more of these little exercises so that we all can get to know each other and become a big happy family.
What are some quick facts about you that no one knows? Comment below and let me know.
Talk to you soon,